江门叱石:英语笑话

来源:百度文库 编辑:高校问答 时间:2024/05/03 05:25:57
哪位可以给我提供一篇英语短笑话啊 在课堂上表演 时间大概在1分钟 难度大概小学英语五年级水平差不多 谢谢了啊
这个笑话的意思啊 可以解释一下吗?

选一选吧
1Fine for Parking
Tell me again," asked the judge, "why you parked there?" The driver rose and answered respectfully(尊敬地), "Because, Your Honor, it said 'Fine for Parking'" (note: "fine" has two meanings 1) good 2) pay some money for doing something wrong.

2.Self-help
I went into a bookstore the other day and asked the woman behind the counter where the self-help section was. She said, "If I told you, that would defeat the whole purpose." (note: "self-help" has two meanings 1) you take without paying 2) you can choose as you like)

3.I Couldn't Digest So Many Apples
Doctor gravely(严肃地): "If you want to enjoy a long life, each time you feel like a drink. Eat an apple instead." Patient: "Sorry, I couldn't digest(消化) so many apples."

4.Is This a Question
A college student in a philosophy class was taking his first examination. On the paper there was a single line which simply said: "Is this a question? " A student wrote: "If that is a question, then this is an answer." The students received an "A" on the exam.

5.A Dollar Per Point
A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over, the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying, "A dollar per point." The next class the professor handed the tests back out. This student got back his test and $64 change.

如果不好可登陆http://www.poptool.net/life/joke/127/story_5073.html

The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours. then he started again, and said he:"Let me ask the evolutionist a question --- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they?"

"I'll venture an answer, " said an old lady. "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".

教进化论的老师已经滔滔不绝地讲了快两个小时,他的话题又来了:“让我向进化论者提个问题——如果我们曾经像狒狒那样长着尾巴,那么现在尾巴到哪里去了?”

“我来试试看,”一位老太太说。
“该是我们在这里坐这么久把它们磨掉了吧。”