我家的莱篮子:修改英语作文!!

来源:百度文库 编辑:高校问答 时间:2024/04/29 23:06:18
请帮忙找出错误。要详细说说错在哪里和修改哦,找出最多错误而正确的。
小女子无以为报,以15分谢之~~
To see the film
The senventh day of Spring Festival. My little sister and I stayed at home and had nothing to do. My little sister said she was so bored. So I decided to go to the cinema to saw a film with her.
When we arrived the cinema. I found that the film named "KingKong" was showing. I have ever seen the forenotice of it. It seems to be a good film. I bought tickets and go into the cinema to see it.
The leading leading actor of the film is a huge orangutang named Kingkong.
"Oh,it's very cute!"My little sister said to me,"What do you think about it?"
"Cute?Oh,maybe."I didn't think it's cute at all.
"Why does a orangutang can be so huge?"She asked me.
"It isn't a really orangutang.It was made by computer."I said.
"Why do the people&****;** the land looked so terrible?Where do they from?"
"I don't konw. Don't ask me so many questions.You're so boring."I said to her angery.
Then she didn't say anything and saw the film concentration.
But when my little sister saw KingKong was being shooting. She began shouting "No!"and scream loudly.
Many audience were looking us.
"Shut up! Be quiet! You're in the cinema!"I said to her.
Thanks for the film was ended soon,we leave the cinema and go home.
"It's really a wonderful film,right?"My little sister said.
"Maybe, if I hadn't take you with me!"

The senventh day of Spring Festival. My little sister and I stayed at home and had nothing to do. My little sister said she was so bored. So I decided to go to the cinema to saw a film with her.
When we arrived the cinema. I found that the film named "KingKong" was showing. I have ever seen the forenotice of it. It seems to be a good film. I bought tickets and go into the cinema to see it.
The leading leading actor of the film is a huge orangutang named Kingkong.
"Oh,it's very cute!"My little sister said to me,"What do you think about it?"
"Cute?Oh,maybe."I didn't think it's cute at all.
"Why does a orangutang can be so huge?"She asked me.
"It isn't a really orangutang.It was made by computer."I said.
"Why do the people&****;** the land looked so terrible?Where do they from?"
"I don't konw. Don't ask me so many questions.You're so boring."I said to her angery.
Then she didn't say anything and saw the film concentration.
But when my little sister saw KingKong was being shooting. She began shouting "No!"and scream loudly.
Many audience were looking us.
"Shut up! Be quiet! You're in the cinema!"I said to her.
Thanks for the film was ended soon,we leave the cinema and go home.
"It's really a wonderful film,right?"My little sister said.
"Maybe, if I hadn't taken you with me!"

On then senventh day of Spring Festiva, my little sister and I stayed at home and had nothing to do. My little sister said she was so bored. So I decided to go to the cinema to see a film with her.
When we arrived at the cinema. I found that the film named "KingKong" was being shown. I have ever seen the forenotice of it. It seems to be a good film. I bought the tickets and went into the cinema.
The leading actor of the film is a huge orangutang named Kingkong.
"Oh,it's very cute!"My little sister said to me,"What do you think of it?"
"Cute?Oh,maybe."I don't think it's cute at all.
"Why can an orangutang be so huge?"She asked me.
"It isn't a real orangutang.It was made by the computer."I said.
"Why do the people&****;** the land look so terrible?Where do they come from?"
"I don't konw. Don't ask me so many questions.You're so boring."I said to her angrily.
Then she didn't say anything and saw the film quietly.
But when my little sister saw KingKong was being shot. She began shouting "No!"and screamed loudly.
Many audience were looking at us.
"Shut up! Be quiet! You're in the cinema!"I said to her.
As the film ended soon,we left the cinema and went back home.
"It's really a wonderful film,right?"My little sister said.
"Maybe, if I hadn't taken you with me!"
这篇作文总的来说写得不错,(特别是最后一句的虚拟语气用的很好)除了有些时态用法的错误.今后在写作文时一定要注意时态,你整篇文章都在讲述发生在过去的一件事,所以要用相关的表示过去的时态.
如果这是高考中满分为25分的作文,你可以得到18分.继续努力!

Go to see a film.
on the seventh day of Spring Festival period ( spring festival is normally considered to be the first day of January on Chinese lunar calendar. Here you may as well say on Jau. 7th on lunar canlendar ) My little sister and I stayed at home and had nothing to do. My little sister said she was so bored. So I decided to go to cinema with her. (or we decided to go to cinema. Going to cinema means going to see a film. In the sentence “Go to cinema and see a film” , “and see a film” is redundant )
When we arrived at the cinema, (reach someplace =arrive at \in someplace. Reach is vt but arrive is vi) I found that a film named "KingKong" was on show. I have ever seen the forenotice of it. It seems to be a good film. I bought two tickets and went into the cinema.
The leading part of the film is a huge orangutang named Kingkong. (just as you explained to you sister, kingkong was created by computer, he or it is not an actor. )
"Oh,it's very cute!"My little sister said, ( of course you sister was speaking to you. Whom else would she speak to? Try to be as concise as possible )"What do you think of it?" (what do u think of smth=how do u like something)
"Cute?Oh,maybe."I didn't think it's cute at all.
"how can an orangutang be so huge?"She asked me.
"It isn't a real orangutang.It was made by computer."I said.
"Why do the people&****;** the land look so terrible? Where do they come from?" ( where is somebody from=where do somebody come from)
"I don't konw. stop bothering me with so many questions. You're so annoying." I said with anger. ( don’t ask me so many questions. Grammatically it is right, but not natural or true to the situation)
Then she said nothing more and saw the film quietly for the rest part.
But when my little sister saw KingKong was being shot. She began shouting "No!" and screamed loudly.
Many audience were looking at us.
"Shut up! Be quiet! You're in the cinema!"I said to her.
Thank goodness, the film ended soon, we left the cinema and went home.
"It's really a wonderful film,right?" My little sister said.
"Maybe, if I hadn't taken you with me!"

To see the film
The senventh day of Spring Festival. My little sister and I stayed at home and had nothing to do. My little sister said she was so bored. So I decided to go to the cinema to see a film with her.
When we arrived the cinema. I found that the film named "KingKong" was showing. I had ever seen the forenotice of it. It seemed to be a good film. I bought tickets and went into the cinema to see it.
The leading actor of the film is a huge orangutang named Kingkong.
"Oh,it's very cute!"My little sister said to me,"What do you think about it?"
"Cute?Oh,maybe."I didn't think it's cute at all.
"Why does a orangutang can be so huge?"She asked me.
"It isn't a really orangutang.It was made by computer."I said.
"Why do the people&****;** the land looked so terrible?Where do they from?"
"I don't konw. Don't ask me so many questions.You're so bord."I said to her angrily.
Then she didn't say anything and saw the film concentration.
But when my little sister saw KingKong was being shooting. She began shouting "No!"and screamed loudly.
Many audience were looking at us.
"Shut up! Be quiet! You're in the cinema!"I said to her.
Thanks for the film was ended soon,we left the cinema and went home.
"It's really a wonderful film,right?"My little sister said.
"Maybe, if I hadn't take you with me!"

真有你的,你分数太少了,如果是60分以上我会考虑的